Thursday, February 05, 2004

Now Hiring!

"The first great human-rights campaign -- the movement to end slavery in the British Empire -- had no business succeeding. But the legacy of its extraordinary achievement lives on today."

This piece is a great read on the abolition of slavery in Great Britain. What is most striking is the way those involved in the slavery industry attempted to use Orwellian p.r. strategies to sway public opinion against abolition. Consider:
In the biggest slave port, the editor of the Liverpool General Advertiser bemoaned the "infatuation of our country, running headlong into ruin." Pro-slavery forces now launched counterattacks. They bought copies of a pro-slavery book for distribution "particularly at Cambridge" (college towns leaned left even then) and printed 8,000 copies of a pamphlet about how each happy slave family had "a snug little house and garden, and plenty of pigs and poultry." They sponsored a London musical, The Benevolent Planters, in which two black lovers, separated in Africa, end up living on adjoining plantations in the West Indies and are reunited by their kindly owners.
Ok, I think I get it. Slaves were kind of like negro hobbits residing peacefully in the shire. But it gets better:
The slave interests' tactics bore a fascinating resemblance to the way industries under assault try to defend themselves today. When, for instance, there were moves in Parliament to try to regulate the treatment of slaves, the planters hastily drew up a lofty-sounding code of conduct of their own and insisted no government interference was necessary. They considered other P.R. techniques as well. "The vulgar are influenced by names and titles," suggested one pro-slavery writer in 1789. "Instead of SLAVES, let the Negroes be called ASSISTANT-PLANTERS; and we shall not then hear such violent outcries against the slave-trade."
Oh boy. I think even our current keepers of the American perceptual arsenal would be impressed. With that in mind my vulgar friends, I wish to announce that Trickgnosis Industries Inc. is hiring.

WANTED: ASSISTANT PLANTERS
Do you like working outdoors? Do you love nature? Have you been thinking that it's time to get in shape? If so, Trickgnosis has a once in a lifetime opportunity for you! If you're not afraid of a little hard work, and would relish a challenging entry level position with the possibility of advancement in a fast-paced global industry, then we want to talk to you. We offer a competitive benefits package complete with a snug little house and garden and plenty of pigs and poultry. No experience is necessary, we have an extensive on-site training program for all applicants. Simply make your way to the coast of West Africa. We'll find you. Or look for our roving bands of recruiters throughout the continent.